读书学习笔记

* Like in any country, you need to have enough literary, historical, artistic and philosophical knowledge to appreciate the culture that nurtures you and the people admired in your society. I want to appreciate the cultures of the English-speaking world and their roots and origins. And I want to be admired. One old friend of mine, who used to be my colleague back in Harbin where we both worked for his brother’s company, teased me: “You continue learning and studying English? You want to teach Englishmen English?”. I wish I could. But, not to be mistaken. Such deeds have been accomplished by others whose native tongues are not English at all and whose books on the English language have become authoritative ones in the English-speech world. I can set my goals as ambitious as theirs. After all, as I said, or rather I quoted another person as saying, “Nothing happens unless first a dream.” Who can be sure you, Chang Guohua, are not to become Guohua the Great for Something?…

* Let me now preach a little about the European culture to those with little knowledge of it. Greco-Roman and Judeo-Christian elements characterize the culture, just as Confucius and Buddhism have deeply influenced the Chinese culture, though maybe to a lesser extent.

* I now know that, after reading, the term “Bible” means different things to different people. For Judaism, it is the Old Testament as known to Christians. Judaism only accepts the Old Testament as the true Bible and rejects Jesus Christ as the Son of God. But, for different denominations of Christians, it is a collection of different books or different versions or translations of them divided into the Old and New Testaments. (20050920)

* “You know what you’re doing?” I have found myself facing a totally different world of cultures, histories and arts. There is too long a list of strange people, events, places, wars, styles of buildings and culture-charged passages I want to understand, appreciate and remember. I’ve decided that I must be a man knowing almost every facet of the cultures behind the English language. Without this knowledge, no major process can be made in my preparing to become a competent interpreter. When I opened the book that introduces me into the wonderful world of European culture, I might be as happy, pleasantly surprised as a famous man when he for the first time came across the ancient Greek mythology.

* Renaissance is a “rebirth of classical learning and knowldge through the rediscovery of ancient texts and also a rebirth of European culture in general”. ( Wikipedia.org) The term Renaissance (文艺复兴) seems to me a happy, historical period in the West during which a large number of artists (Leonardo da Vinci, etc.), buildings of different styles (Gothic, etc.), paintings, sculptures, music and others combined to create a great age that built up a great force leading to the Industrial Revolution. In my mind’s eye, the Renaissance was the turning point when the West started to overtake China. I was very sad to find in my reading no Chinese thinkers, philosophers, scientists or artisans that were matches on their Western counterparts when the West was doing their “Renaissance”. Renaissance refers to the period between 15th and the mid 17th century in Europe and roughly corresponds to the Ming Dynasty (1368-1644) and early Qing Dynasty (1644-1911) in China. The Chinese people were busy trying to fossilate their long-accustomed feudalism glory and refused to be jolted by a rude awakening from their pipe dream of prosperity and fool’s paradise-like pride. China was actually rotting inside with its outside appearance buoyed up only by its accumulation of the past, including tradition, wealth, knowledge, ideology, and burden of thousands of years, instead of innovations, inventions, and discoveries that might grow out of the past.

Now, I’d like to give you some more information you might need to make you updated on the idea of Renaissance. This term is now often replaced by “Early Modern”. Renaisssance, like the Bible, means different cultural movements that started “at different places at different times”. In addition, the period did not seem so happy to all the contemporary people, especially the poor, who even felt their Renaissance life worsened, compared to the dark days of the Middle Ages. ( Wikipedia.org) (20050925)

* I believe I have chosen the right way to grow to be an interpreter or a simultaneous interpreter. First, establish a strong foundation on which I can build an empire of whatsoever knowledge and skills I need. Second, build this empire with whatsoever I can find and need.

* Here is what I want to tell myself: Set a goal and work towards it, and you will achieve it. Set another and approach it in the same way, and you will achieve it, too. WORK, DO NOT WAIT FOR TIME. (20051112)

*Good homework is what I need now. I know this might sound a little strange or disappointing after having spent so much time working and studying for a goal I’ve always failed to define. Yes, this is in fact what I’ve always wanted to do—good homework that is purely a phase I must go through before anything else. Two or three years are not long. Just look back at how many years I’ve been in Harbin (2 years and 9 months) and in Beijing (3 years and 7 months). And consider all my failed New Year resolutions or attempts to finish the Collins, a wonderful source of information on the English language.

I also bought dozens of Chinese classics, all in paperback. These perfumed books are churned out by a Jilin province-based publisher and feature, unfortunately, proofreading and editing under par. I’ve always understood the importance of a good publisher in producing quality books. This is easy to figure out: Sony’s cameras are better than Aigo’s, and they are all cameras though under different names. Nonetheless, I’m reading one of them, a collection of Bai Juyi’s poetry, and have finished a collection of Su Dongpo’s works. The books still have their own values and serve as a source of literary information.

I placed an order of another Longman dictionary to Joyo.com. The book offers a great source of information that is encyclopedic up to a point, which is different from the Collins. And I want to finish it, too. (20060617)

*I know what my problem is. I don’t have the means by which to communicate in the language with native speakers: I don’t know what to say when I’m supposed to say something. For example, I don’t know how to decline an invitation to lunch at lunchtime, and have no small talk and always get right down to business in phone conversations. I even deliberately avoid conversations with a British man also working for the newspaper. My philosophy here seems to be a pursuit of perfectionism: if I don’t know how I can sound sociable in these situations where pleseantries are exchanged, I don’t even bother about them.

It is a painful realization that I have inadequate communications skills when I speak English. In the Chinese context I’d be even thought of as talking too much sometime.

Reading can help me again. Now I’m planning to read a dictionary of spoken English. That might be a good start.

Of course, they are two of the greatest languages in the world. One exerts the most powerful synchronic influence over the face of the Planet. The other, on the contrary, is the strongest diachronic language. It’s been weaving together the history of a single largest country in population and later its much smaller neighbors since its first emperor froze the writing system of the language for the first time when the country proper came into being in A.D. 221.

Which one is more difficult for a foreign learner to learn to speak and write? I believe it is Chinese. Someone has jokingly commented that one needs three months to learn good English, three years to master French and at least thirty years to be proficient in German. As I see it, he has to double his efforts he has put in tackling German to speak and write good Chinese, and those foreigners who manage to speak and write good Chinese must be geniuses.

Does this sound a little too exaggerated? I believe not.

For one thing, most of native Chinese speakers (e.g. me) find it hard to write things in decent Chinese because they have long been isolated from the traditionally accepted and correct way of writing and do not know what rules to follow in their writing. When it comes to foreigners learning Chinese, they have to first find decently and elegantly worded Chinese texts and use them as models. In everyday life in China, they may find that good Chinese writings are in short supply. It seems to me that the correct, smooth and natural tradition of wording Chinese texts was broken somewhere (during the Great Cultural Revolution?) so that its modern speakers are at a loss to know how to write their language.

For example, earlier dated writings, more often than not, sound too old-fashioned, especially those written before 1949, and even before 1978. You can easily come across badly written news reports, government documents, corporate files, etc. Experts, or rather those of at least writing good Chinese, are hard to come by these days, I have to say.

For another, as far as I know, no complete and generally agreed Chinese grammar system has been established out of the language and the current system, if it is one, is believed to be a poor relation of its Western counterparts.

* Why do I not translate what I wrote? (20030717)

Because I think translation is a stupid thing to do. I would like to reserve the difficult job for someone else to do. Tie him or her to my way of wild thinking in Chinese. Make s/he crazy, curse, and feel themselves to be idiots to be translators. And even worse, make them doubtful about their abilities of using the two languages involved and about the reason for their being.

* Communist bureaucrats and their ghost writers write bullshit (20030717 )

What you do is somewhat good—reform and openning up. But what you are talking and writing bores any sensible and reasoned people stiff and sometimes I feel like vomitting because of what you say or write, meaning to “educate” me. First, the well-known “Three Represents”. OK. You represent me. That is good though I have never voted you for one single time. But do you have to regurgitate the Represents every time you do something that you should do by law and by duty? For example, tax collectors collect taxes (and just to line your good regurgitating comrades’s pockets), corrupted investigators investigate rotten “people’s public servants” (the most powerful and richest “servants” in relation to their “masters” in the world), or police officers police the red light district and keep it morally good and hygienically clean for a while. Shut up! Keep quiet! I do not want to hear your idiotic tongues wag.

One more thing. You should hire more sober-minded ghost writers, at least to make yourselve believe what you’re bullshitting. Your present ones are awfully retarded and I bet they’re delirious sometimes at night and give me for translation what they’re dreaming about in their constantly disturbed nightmares.

Looking for a job in Beijing

To come here was a tough decision. I doubted my decision of giving up my long accustomed life back home. I was awed by the uncertainties of future in Beijing and the disbeliefs of my competence racked me. Nonetheless, I came here on November 10, 2002.

Life here could be real tough. Without enough money to pay for things I need, I would have to live with a poorer standard of living than at home, for example, sharing with my roommate a cold room in a one-story house without an indoor toilet in the winter.

Beijing is different from Harbin. It’s a national city, if not an international one while Harbin is just a regional city. I could hear Chinese people down the street in Beijing speaking almost every language and dialect known in China. Sometimes, I would sit in a corner on a bus and be amazed, wondering if I was really in China because a Chinese man who pressed his cellphone against his ear talked a total foreign tongue, neither English nor others I could identify, it’s an unknown Chinese dialect no other people than himself on the bus can understand.

Being in a national city means I have more opportunities than in a provincial city. The bad news is that I may have more than I can chew.

It’s the second week I’d been in Beijing that I decided the adjustment to a new invironment was enough–I needed a job desperately. I sent numerous resumes through 51job.com, chinahr.com and zhaopin.com and printed dozens of copies of my application letter and resume and sent them out to my potential employers by post.

I still remember three of those job interviews.

The first one appeared to be a success for the immediate offer of the job. My job would involve translation in the fields of communications and set-top-boxes, something attached to the top of a TV set to receive paid programs.

I balked at the second interview. I crossed from the western to the eastern part of Beijing after changing several buses. When I got there, it turned out to be a PR (Public Relations) company that had something to do with The Oracle. The first interviewer was a formidable young man wearing a dark business suit. He told me that his was a medium-sized PR company hiring dozens of people and the successful candidate would deal with translations of PR materials.

After he left the room, a woman came back to test my spoken English. I told her that I might have come to a wrong place to look for a job because I didn’t think I was good with people, which were an essential part of a PR position, otherwise PR would make no sense. I did not bother to take the following written test designated for each applicant. I came out of the impressive, imposing building, sighing. A company full of sexy women and big men is not my place. I’m happier with a much smaller company with a relaxing working atmosphere or a larger one without the dressing-yourself-up routine. Let me just think. Actually, I am not sure I like a large company because I’ve never been in one and don’t have an idea of it.

The third company, a translation firm, was extremely small and amazingly young. It’s not only that it just got started, but its boss was also a burgeoning one. I am sure we were born almost the same year and we should be friends, not employees and bosses. After a short spoken test and a long written test, he decided to hire me. But I’d decided I would not accept a job offer from a company with a few girls looking like university kids under a young, novice boss. I left the young company, envying the young man’s position of being am employer. I’m also young, what am I?

Things did not happen as expected. Jiang, the man who’d made his immediate offer of the translating position, seemed to be reconsidering his “rash” decision. He made a follow-up phone call right after I left his office in a corner office building, telling me to do a test of translation. Later on, I did another test. I failed all of them. The translation of contracts regarding Set-Top-Boxes was more than I could chew.

There are at least two kinds of open positions in Beijing when I look for a job–one that I’m worthy of and the other that I’m not.

I always seem to associate a song or several songs with a period of my life in which I listen to them a lot.

Time is racing ahead. I can’t stop it. Neither can anyone else. Nostalgia.

When I listen to songs such as Le Jour s’est Lev, one of the three incomprehensible French songs I got in exchange for three songs by Luo Dayou with a Frenchman, it never fails to reminds me of those days at Brightsun in Harbin, when I just began to learn of the Internet as a new guy at the company with the brand-new status of being an employee after years of being an English student.

Wei-ai-chi-kuang by Liu Ruoying brings me back to those days when I was beginning to learn love, yet another brand-new topic to a freewheeling, awkward, and stupid boy.

And shengxia-de-guoshi by Mo Wenwei comes to me as a reflection of those lovely summer days in Harbin.

Now, new songs, which now I’m not aware of, will serve, when I listen to them again in the future, as nostalgic ones associated with my beginning days in Beijing. Even Delta ForceⅠwill come to me as my first ever computer game I have played for years, when mom is Beijing to see me and US and Britain are invading Iraq.

Time, you don’t stop continuing and we don’t stop aging and dying.